Data and the analysis thereof puts the bread on the table in these parts. This data, however, is the ob-gyn sort. I know, who wants to read about such personal things This act of public journaling is somewhat stifling, in the sense of self-censorship. In a normal pen and ink journal I’d write away with abandon, and how liberating that is, by the way. With this thing called a blog… Well. I hesitate, just a bit. But there are things I want to say, so I will say them.
My post-op appointment went well. My doctor recommended abstinence* for a cycle, to allow the uterus to heal and strengthen. And should a cycle not return, an induction via progesterone. I’ve been down that path before. Following the next cycle, relations can resume, and if a natural cycle does not return within a reasonable time, then another round of Clomid. I’ve been down that path before as well. With all this focus on cycles or lack thereof, and the biological clock clanging away, I started reading up on ovulation predictor kits (OPKs), and was tempted to buy some. After considering the cost, I thought I’d try charting basal body temperature again. I found a year’s worth of data in my ob-gyn file. Sure, it was several years old, but it told the same old story. There is no rhyme or reason. No pattern. No predictability. So what good is bbt If the temperature rise tells you that you’ve just ovulated, then you’re already too late. I don’t see how that information is helpful to anybody unless they are regular as clockwork, so they can get a trend and have a good idea of when the fertile times are. I ordered a new thermometer anyway. In the interest of science. My data will likely be skewed, what with having to wrestle with the cpap mask in order to use the thermometer. As well, first thing in the morning for me doesn’t mean my body has been peacefully at rest for several hours. More like three hours, since there is a diaper changing stupor taking place somewhere between 2:30 and 3:30 a.m. Every. Single. Morning. ….yawwwwwwwnnnn…..
Of course there is a plethora of information on the internet, so I stumbled across the saliva testing method. I don’t know how this information slipped my mind. I’ve read all about it before. I even bought a lipstick style microscope, which was a fun gadget for about a week or so, but alas, it didn’t hold up to my overly aggressive focus or cleaning techniques. Or something. I thought I was onto something, though, so I bought a much bigger and stronger microscope, with removable slides on which to place the sample. I feel like such a scientist when I’m gazing through the eyepiece, scrutinizing the sample. It’s so very CSI. I refreshed my memory on the interpretation of the data, i.e., the fern crystal phenomenon and its relation to ovulation, then rifled through my cabinets in search of the microscope. Once found, I eagerly applied a sample and waited for it to dry. Voila! Crystals. Of course, I’d just eaten soup, and a bit more reading suggested that food, toothpaste, etc. can skew the data, therefore, it’s important to use fresh morning saliva. What a let-down, after being so excited to see those crystals. The next morning I dutifully licked a new slide and lo-and-behold, I found some crystals. The pattern would be what I’d call a transitional ferning pattern. It could mean that I’m entering a fertile period. Add to that Mr. Gadget’s sudden interest in getting cozy. Could I be emitting come-and-get-me pheromones He pretends to have a memory lapse regarding the doctor’s orders. I kindly remind him that this abstinence business is largely due to his attitude regarding latex. Hrumph says he. Hrumph say I. The next day I see more ferns. Still transitional, to my keen scientific eye. Today Today I see full on fern crystals. Add to that the sudden appearance of cm. It’s a banner day, and part of me wants to scrap the doctor’s orders and get down to business (because who knows when and if the next naturally fertile time will come ), but part of me is terrified of losing another baby, and that part wins. So I hold on to this data, and look at the brightest side. If in fact it is good data, it means that I should have a real, natural, non-progesterone-induced flow. And that is good news.
It’s a bit hard to express the feelings that this data gathering elicits. Or rather, explain the excitement. The thing is, there’s something about having a real, natural period that makes me feel alive, like I don’t have a bum model (…a lemon, so to speak) after all. Things are working. There is hope. If in fact I am ovulating, I should have a period, so I won’t have to take progesterone. And that pleases me much. And if I don’t have to take the progesterone, maybe I won’t have to take the Clomid. Maybe all systems are go, after all. So there it is. Hope. A little bit of data, and suddenly I have hope again. That is a very good thing.
*Actually, barrier methods were recommended, but abstinence trumps latex, so abstinence it is.
